Things that make you think

Recently, friends of ours lived through an extremely traumatic event and then witnessed a miracle. I won't go into details because I received the information by a 3rd party who heard it from another 3rd party, but the gist of the story is that their baby wandered into the pool, was under water for a minute until they noticed she was there, and was brought back to life. The miracle is made even sweeter by the fact that the doctors say there was not a single shred of damage done.

I had a very difficult time digesting this story. Even though this "horror story had a happy ending", as the father told a friend, I was deeply disturbed. I couldn't help but think how sick I would feel if I had lived through something so traumatic. I hate to admit it, but my first thoughts were harshly judgmental (this is a side effect of growing up with an extremely judgmental mother. I am constantly trying to better myself in this area, however, sometimes I screw up). I then immediately said to myself, "How dare you!" This was an accident that could have happened to anyone. In an instant, anything can happen to anyone.

I cannot pinpoint exactly why, but this bittersweet story has left a scar on my heart. Maybe it's because I have to leave my own kids each day, for what feels like days on end, and not know each moment what they are doing or where they are. While my husband is more than capable of caring for the kids and should get the dad of the year award, I can't help but feel like a bad mom because I'm not there. I've always felt a little pang of this in the past, but after hearing this horrific story, I feel it on a higher level.

I will close by saying that I hope this family does not dwell on the bad part of the story, but on the very happy ending. Life is so precious and short. I hope I think of this story every time I start taking something for granted.

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." -- Buddha

Well good morning to you too!

Maybe I have my facts wrong. Maybe the laws are different in the different towns, cities, and states on this one. But aren't bicyclists supposed to "share the road"? I had an interesting experience with a high school kid on a bike the other day while I was waiting for the bus. My bus stop is right on a sidewalk. So naturally, I stand on that sidewalk while I wait patiently for my bus. I always stand closer to the road than the yard because, well, that's where I'll need to get onto the bus. Seems quite logical to me (but then, who am I?). So, Monday, I'm standing there, in the same place I stand every day looking in the direction my bus will hopefully soon be coming. All of a sudden behind me I hear someone say something, but I can't quite hear what they said. So I turn toward the voice and see this kid on a bike coming right for me! Now, I haven't moved since I planted myself in that spot 5 minutes ago, but for some reason, this kid thinks I should move, I assume because I happen to be on the right side of the sidewalk. He has plenty of room to the left of the sidewalk, but he doesn't seem to think that makes sense. Instead, he heads right for me, without even slowing down, I might add. So my first instinct is to move more to the right (closer to the curb/street) into the grassy area between the sidewalk and the curb, which I guess was his first instinct too because he about brushed me with the bike as he passed me, screaming "Whoa!" like he was surprised that this happened. I apologized, even though I did nothing wrong (I do that all the time...one of my many flaws).

I couldn't believe this kid! He was going fast enough that he had to have been hauling down that sidewalk for some distance, which means he had to have seen me standing there, not moving and not looking in that direction. How could he not know this was going to happen? Maybe it's because he's a kid and was thinking about other things, like asking Lafonda to the Homecoming dance or how that big zit on his chin was going to ruin him, who knows! But for heaven's sake, pay attention! If he would have hit me, I would have been seriously injured because he was going so fast. And let's not forget the fact that I believe that bikers are supposed to ride in the street, I'll bet for this very reason!

At least no one was hurt, but damn. You know how you're supposed to do one thing a day that scares you? Well, that was mine on Monday.

So, it's been a while...

I know it's been a while since I've updated. I've been...well, I don't really have any excuse except that I've been tired. Yes, I said tired. Exhausted, really. I was recently diagnosed with Hypothyroidism in May (although I knew this had to be the case since January, it took the doctors a while longer to figure it out. Great health care system we have, huh?) and I've been sleeping through every spare minute of every day. So I'm finally on some medication and I've cut back on some other activities I normally do in my free time so that I can update my blog.

Not much is going on around here. The kids are more at each other's throats than ever. I'm really hoping that Charlie starting school again on Tuesday helps this issue. I think the problem is that Elizabeth has finally learned to fight back when she thinks she is being wronged, which is pretty much all the time. I'm sure this is just a phase, but it's tough. I know, I know, I have it easy because Doug stays home with the kids 40 hours a week, but I deal with it at night and on the weekends. But I have found that red wine in their sippy cups with dinner helps. Just kidding...but it does help when I drink a glass! I am more relaxed and I respond better. They like this and it seems to work for me. Not to mention all of the other health benefits of red wine.

We also found out that Doug has some nasty fungus on his feet. Gross. I think that's really all I have to say about that.

So we have preschool orientation tomorrow evening, so I'm excited that I get to be Crazy Psycho Mom for a night. It saddens me that I cannot do this on a daily basis like those Stay At Home Moms I deeply envy. But on this particular night every year, I am always there, asking all the questions I know will come up throughout the year that my husband will undoubtedly "forget" to ask (even though I will mention them 182 times, not in a nagging way, of course). I get to meet all of the other moms for the second time (I met them all last year at this time too) and they will all scowl at me because we're not a "normal" family with a father who works 80 hours a week so that his wife can stay at home with the kids and pop bon-bons all day, um, I mean tend to the kids and household. Nope, we're freaks because mom goes to work every day and dad does the bon-bon thing. Thank goodness I only have to survive 1 night of horrible mommy guilt from the "other" mothers (as if I don't have enough of this from my own self).

Stay tuned...I plan to start another blog of product reviews and great deals I stumble upon. I just have to think of a name for it...

Ciao!

The best sound in the world

The best sound that you will ever hear is that of your own children laughing. This occurred to me tonight as I was on my hands and knees cleaning up another massacre, ahem, I mean dinner mess. There I am, in my own world picking corn up off the floor and I realize that my kids are belly laughing at each other in the playroom. I almost cried, right there, with a hand full of corn. For me, it was like the whole world stopped and it was just me sitting there listening to them laugh in the next room. And they had no idea that I was listening so intently to them, which made it even better. This is one of the things that make me love being a mom. I know they will not always be each other's best friend and that right now it's only really out of necessity because they're too young to have any other friends, but I am going to enjoy it while I can. They just make it so darn easy!

Run Forest!

One of my goals for 2008 is to run a 5k. I don't know why I came up with this particular goal, but now I'm really serious about it. I even found this website that tells you how to go from the "couch to 5k". That sounded about right. I jogged last summer for exercise, but in November, it just got too dang cold for me to be out there. And I don't feel like I get a workout on a treadmill. It could be that our treadmill is about 30 years old, but that's all we have, so it's just not working for me. So I went all winter without even exercising at all. So I pretty much consider myself a beginner again. I was up to 3 miles last year and a 5k is only 3.1 miles, so I figure this isn't a huge stretch. I don't expect to do well; in fact, I expect to come in dead last, but I don't even care. At least I will have done it.

So I was finally able to get out yesterday morning and I was even able to wear a short sleeved shirt because it was so nice. Even at 6:30am, it was pretty warm for April. I jogged about .2 mile and walked the rest of the way. I felt like such a loser! Today I got out, though it was chilly and I had to wear a jacket, I managed. I probably jogged close to a mile and then walked the rest of the way. So I'm going in the right direction at least. According to the website, tomorrow is supposed to be my resting day, thank heavens! My legs hurt so bad (the good hurt, like when you have gotten a good workout). My muscles are probably in shock right now, wondering what the heck is going on. But that's OK. They'll get used to it soon. I predict by next weekend, they'll get over it. I just hope the weather stays nice enough to get out. I really can't go back to that treadmill. I've nearly fallen off of that thing numerous times. True story!